Even I feel it's not that long living in London though it's been 8 month since I came here. Wow, it seems many in number... and yes, I've done many things.
I changed a flat once. I lived in Charlton which is in southeast London however I moved to the central London. I am living in Russell Square now. I got 3 flatmates, two of them are a couple and one is single lady, and everyone is Japanese. The formar flatmates were more variated in nationality. There were French couple whom are really good friends of mine still and a Latovian girl, and Turkish landlord. As like a nomal case, the landlord wasn't that nice as every landlord is not usually.
I went to Oxford for this summer studying English. It was great time that I could be an irresponsible language student. It wasn't a great summer weather in Oxford but I made some other trip to Amsterdam and Milan. Surprisingly, it was cheap.I went to Amsterdam to see my friends from Japan, but they are not Japanese. They were exchange students from Lyden University. I visited my friends in Milan as well and I made some little trips there. I didn't have much luck for the weather though it was fun. My boyfriend came with me to Amsterdam but not to Milan. We had a good time in Ams riding bikes around there. It was great.
He had been in Japan, Tokyo for the summer. It sounds that he liked there. I think that staying in Tokyo as a forigner is interesting. I do love Japan and I would go back eventually though I don't think Tokyo is the best place to live. I prefer country for living anyhow.
Nevertheless, I miss Japan thesedays a lot. Maybe it's not Japan but what I can do in Japan seems much more than here. For example the research on Japanese crafts still attracts me a lot. I cannot give it up still and sometimes that memory drags me back to the thought "what am I doing here besides what I can do in Japan?"
Of course there many things I want to learn and study here and I feel I'm making progress. Therefore I don't think it's wasting time nor regret having come here. I'm enjoying my new study, Japanese language education, and I'm teaching privately which is quite interesting. Moreover I try to enter a master course of art history here. Now I'm studying English for that.
The foundimental question is where I am heading. There are many oppotunities and things I want to do. Since I will have a qualification for teaching Japanese, I could survive anywhere in the world. And I'm fascinated by Mexico. I want to live there sometime. I could do it after finishing my study. Or I deal Japanese crafts with people I know from the research. It's harder but I got some connections and they seem to be functioning.
But in those cases, I won't be with my boyfriend. Even it was in Japan, I don't think it is easy for him to be there. He is young and bright but not like me, rolling weed. I love him and now he is an important condition in my decision. I never want to hurt him more. There are too many things that I cannot tell him about my wishes.
The timing is everything of the life. Then maybe if I find a job in Mexico before my boyfriend becomes the most important element in my life I would choose Mexico. Or if there will be an interesting job dealing Japanese crafts abroad, I would take it.
Anyhow it should be my choice because he doesn't take a responsibility for my life. Well, actually I don't know what he wants to do and how much he want to come into my life. I don't have any idea whether he wants to be with me for long making a lot of effort. And I don't have enough courage to ask him them. Because we haven't had crucial conversation a lot. Because we haven't spent daily life a lot together. He might not know how I am actually. I'm such a coward. sigh.
Tuesday, December 8, 2009
Tuesday, March 24, 2009
before going to London
I just have 5 days before leaving Japan to UK. weirdly I don't feel it's a something special. maybe because I've traveled a lot, knowing moving is not that big deal, if I go to an airport and take a plane I'll be there in few hours. it'll be fine.
but my next studying field is language education, which I've never studied, so it's a bit challenge for me. I don't know how much I can do, but just try my best and believe myself.
before going to London I traveled to Korea and in Japan, Kyushu. Nagasaki, Saga(Arita, Imari,Karatsu), Fukuoka, Korea, Oita(Beppu), Kyoto. traveling makes me refreshed as always. I could meet many interesting things and people.
In Nagasaki, I had 3 nights and 4 days.I checked some 19th-early 20th century architectures. I found they are pretty houses mixture of Western and Japanese style. Nagasaki is quite famous for having been one of few doors opened to western culture during Japanese isolation period. so there had effect from Europe since early time. the atmosphere is a bit exotic than other cities and there are many steep uphill and downhill. Of course it faces to the sea, but they don't have good sea food, but some sweets came from Portugal.
In Saga, I visited some kilns. it was interesting to see how they manage their business now. Luckily I could talked with a potter. we talked a lot about the situation of current Japanese ceramicist, moreover traditional craft. I'm convinced that what I studied was right.
In Fukuoka, a friend who met in Nagasaki came to see me again, and we went to a shrine Dazaifu and had really fun. Since I'm into Salsa dance these days, I asked friends in my hostel to go to an event. they even have never tried Salsa dance before but they liked a lot, and we swear to practice Salsa dance and dance together someday together.
shamefully it was the first time to visit Korea even it's the closest country to Japan. I stayed in Seoul for 3 nights, but actually I just had less than 3 days since I arrived in Busan by a ferry, and Busan to Seoul takes 3 hours by an express train. I hanged around with my friends from Netherlands, one of them has a girlfriend in Korea. He was a guide of me and others. Everything is cheap as I heard, however I didn't buy anything but meal because my back-pack wasn't big enough for any souvenir. I didn't get anything but I left my umbrella there though.
after that I visited Beppu where I had been twice. There are nothing but Onsen. Since I'd been there before for long, the hostel stuff remembered me. She took me to an opening party of an artist near to Beppu. It was exciting experience. I could see how the art scene expand through people to people. Again I could talked with a crafts artist, she liked me as I talked about my study so far pointing out some problems and ideas of the way expand Japanese crafts to the world. I spend meaningful time there.
In the evening and the day after I saw my friend who is studying in Beppu. We discussed about love relationship. I couldn't agree with his idea for current relationship. He leaves Japan on August, and he has a girlfriend in Japan. He says he's gonna break up with her as they are apart and even they came to agreement with this contract. I thought it's weird. According to him, the time spend together would worth it even they will have gotten hurt by the time of apart. I guess maybe it will, but what's the point to be couple? they could have good time just being friends. I cannot understand why he confessed to the girl knowing to hurt her in the end, and himself. Who can be in love knowing the end will come soon? Ok, if they're having fun, it doesn't matter. but then how he can restrain her, or they could be faithful? moreover Love is not controllable, that why it's hart but brain. of course it's better not to make a promise in the future, it's just cruel, but putting the date of end is not the best thing for a love relationship. I don't think if they could be fine soon afterwards, it wasn't love. therefore it sounds just having fun. However they are not that kind of people, especially the girl. He says she understands this relationship, but actually she doesn't. In Kyoto, I saw her and had a chatting about this. Of course she loves him but doesn't agree with this "love contract". Both of us doubt if he will be able to say good-bye without pain. The great thing is that she said she's gonna try to make him to be in love with her to get hurt or not to be able to say good-bye when they apart. She is a cool girl!
In Kyoto I run into my friend being with her boyfriend from US. It was a coincident but I was really glad to see them together. they've been apart so far and just talked on the internet. I want to see my friend's happy face.
Now I'm at parents place preparing for London. Wish everything goes well. Even if it doesn't, I'll make it does as much as possible. It's spring time, everything starts.
but my next studying field is language education, which I've never studied, so it's a bit challenge for me. I don't know how much I can do, but just try my best and believe myself.
before going to London I traveled to Korea and in Japan, Kyushu. Nagasaki, Saga(Arita, Imari,Karatsu), Fukuoka, Korea, Oita(Beppu), Kyoto. traveling makes me refreshed as always. I could meet many interesting things and people.
In Nagasaki, I had 3 nights and 4 days.I checked some 19th-early 20th century architectures. I found they are pretty houses mixture of Western and Japanese style. Nagasaki is quite famous for having been one of few doors opened to western culture during Japanese isolation period. so there had effect from Europe since early time. the atmosphere is a bit exotic than other cities and there are many steep uphill and downhill. Of course it faces to the sea, but they don't have good sea food, but some sweets came from Portugal.
In Saga, I visited some kilns. it was interesting to see how they manage their business now. Luckily I could talked with a potter. we talked a lot about the situation of current Japanese ceramicist, moreover traditional craft. I'm convinced that what I studied was right.
In Fukuoka, a friend who met in Nagasaki came to see me again, and we went to a shrine Dazaifu and had really fun. Since I'm into Salsa dance these days, I asked friends in my hostel to go to an event. they even have never tried Salsa dance before but they liked a lot, and we swear to practice Salsa dance and dance together someday together.
shamefully it was the first time to visit Korea even it's the closest country to Japan. I stayed in Seoul for 3 nights, but actually I just had less than 3 days since I arrived in Busan by a ferry, and Busan to Seoul takes 3 hours by an express train. I hanged around with my friends from Netherlands, one of them has a girlfriend in Korea. He was a guide of me and others. Everything is cheap as I heard, however I didn't buy anything but meal because my back-pack wasn't big enough for any souvenir. I didn't get anything but I left my umbrella there though.
after that I visited Beppu where I had been twice. There are nothing but Onsen. Since I'd been there before for long, the hostel stuff remembered me. She took me to an opening party of an artist near to Beppu. It was exciting experience. I could see how the art scene expand through people to people. Again I could talked with a crafts artist, she liked me as I talked about my study so far pointing out some problems and ideas of the way expand Japanese crafts to the world. I spend meaningful time there.
In the evening and the day after I saw my friend who is studying in Beppu. We discussed about love relationship. I couldn't agree with his idea for current relationship. He leaves Japan on August, and he has a girlfriend in Japan. He says he's gonna break up with her as they are apart and even they came to agreement with this contract. I thought it's weird. According to him, the time spend together would worth it even they will have gotten hurt by the time of apart. I guess maybe it will, but what's the point to be couple? they could have good time just being friends. I cannot understand why he confessed to the girl knowing to hurt her in the end, and himself. Who can be in love knowing the end will come soon? Ok, if they're having fun, it doesn't matter. but then how he can restrain her, or they could be faithful? moreover Love is not controllable, that why it's hart but brain. of course it's better not to make a promise in the future, it's just cruel, but putting the date of end is not the best thing for a love relationship. I don't think if they could be fine soon afterwards, it wasn't love. therefore it sounds just having fun. However they are not that kind of people, especially the girl. He says she understands this relationship, but actually she doesn't. In Kyoto, I saw her and had a chatting about this. Of course she loves him but doesn't agree with this "love contract". Both of us doubt if he will be able to say good-bye without pain. The great thing is that she said she's gonna try to make him to be in love with her to get hurt or not to be able to say good-bye when they apart. She is a cool girl!
In Kyoto I run into my friend being with her boyfriend from US. It was a coincident but I was really glad to see them together. they've been apart so far and just talked on the internet. I want to see my friend's happy face.
Now I'm at parents place preparing for London. Wish everything goes well. Even if it doesn't, I'll make it does as much as possible. It's spring time, everything starts.
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